On page 65 we see Alice having a certain distrust towards men. "We were praying for my soul. I stared at Father Breuniger's crotch. Though about what he was under all that black. He was a man. He had a dick like every man did. What right had he, I wondered, to pray for my soul?" She doesn't even think a Priest has the right to pray for her soul. She has been raped by a man who was stronger than her, he had more power; preist's have the power as well. Making that connection maybe she is scared; scared to trust anyone with any power over her at all. She see's right through people doing nice gestures for her as if it's going in one ear and out the other; she just ignores it and worries about men.

On page 38 Alice reveals something to us; her mother was an alcoholic. "My mother's pillows when I was little smelled like cherries. It was a sickeningly sweet smell. It was the same way my rapist smelled on the night of the rape. I would not admit to myself until years later that this was the smell of alcohol." Alice's mother and her rapist now have something in common. Drinking. Maybe this foreshadows trust issues with Alice and her mother, or maybe this foreshadows a big tragedy where Alice doesn't want her mother to drink anymore.

In Alice's Eyes

Alice never expected what came about her on walk to campus. She beaten and raped. She says " Here, I began to combine truth with fiction, using, anything to try and get him to come over to my side. To see me as pitiful, for him to see me as worse off than him." [ pg.9] She seems to have a sort of self-insecurity. She sees herself as less than him. This man who just raped and beat her is now more than her. She see's herself as pitful. Evoking a feeling of contempt. That's the definition of pitiful. SHe means it for him "to see that she is worthless." This happening to someone who believes they're worthless, in a way could help them. Help them see that nothing like that should ever happen to anyone, ever. To educate girls her age to be more careful, people will listen to her, and she'll feel like she, for once, serves a purpose.

The whole time she's describing her tale she sounds scared, naturally, but educated too. She's thinking of anything to think about and she cannot get a clear understanding of this man. How in the beggining he can beat her, then make relations with her, and then lastly sincerely cry and appologize for what he had done. In the very first paragraph of the book he says, " I'll kill you if you scream." Later he said " Talk to me," "I believe you,your a virgin. I'm your first."[pg.11] Lastly he cryed and said "I'm so sorry." [pg. 13] This must indicate he has done this more than once. His actions seemed rehearsed and practiced. Like he's crying on the outside but on the inside knowing he's just feeding these young women bullshit, to confuse them. For a MAN to rape and beat WOMAN, he has to have a mind of a criminal. No feeling, no heart, and certainly no life ahead of him. This is what brought me to our discussions in class about the ideal qualities of men and women. Does this make him a boy, not a man? Does this mean he'll never be a man? Does this experience change Alice from an immature girl to a mature experienced woman? He cannot be a man. Men do not hurt women. Men do not take their strength and take advantage of a girls weakness, her virginity. The one thing that once a women looses, she can't get back. Men do not worsen women, men make us better.

On page 26 Alice reveals to her mother what had happened the night before.
"Mom,"
"What is it, Alice? You know I'm due over soon; can't it wait?"
"Mom, I need to tell you somthing."
She heard it now. "What, what is it?"
"Last night I was beaten and raped in the park."
A mother hearing of their young beautiful little girl they had just sent of to college being raped and beaten must have a huge affect on them as well.